Caught in the middle with an HR issue

Dear Amy:  I have a common HR issue that I am unable to solve as I am caught in the middle with nowhere to turn.  An employee under my direction is related to both of the company principals.  No one outside top management is privy to this knowledge because this person does not share the same last name.  I can’t go into details here, so I will speak in generalities.

This person is what is commonly known as a slacker.  One of my roles as supervisor is to serve as mentor to help this employee succeed in this industry and I am failing miserably.  This employee is a spoiled brat, has had life handed to them on a silver platter, including this entry level position.  I have gone to extreme efforts to teach this person good business practices and have explained office politics in great detail.  

I recently met privately with upper level to discuss the employee’s antics to show how they are upsetting other employees.  Upper management wants to give this person real life experience working for a “name-brand” company because it will reflect favorably on their resume once they are trained and move on.  In the long run, this choice will likely cost the company the loss of some long time employees because in recent weeks, some in my crew have threatened to quit over the situation unless I do something to stop this or fire the employee. 

My hands are literally tied.  Walking away on principal will cost me dearly as I am very well paid, a shareholder and a few years shy of a hefty retirement and bonus package.  Staying, on the other hand, is costing me in self-pride and loss of respect by my peers.  Any suggestions?  I have a gut feeling I know what you’ll say.

Dear Reader: You have my deepest empathy for this seemingly impossible situation. However, there is hope.  First and foremost you can solve this issue and maintain your employment with this company. 

First take a deep breath, let it out slowly.  Yes, I am serious take a deep breath and let it out slowly. Take another deep breath, let it out slowly. When we are stressed and at our wits end, we tend to shallow breathe, which deprives the brain of much needed oxygen. Taking deep breaths helps you to slow your thinking and center your mind, so that you are responding rather than reacting to information.

Now that you are calmer, keep an open mind as you read this.  Keep in mind that the principals of your company have tremendous respect and confidence in you to ask you to help them with what is a family mess.  Take another deep breath, let it out slowly.  Now stay calm and centered as I describe a step by step solution.

You can help this woman, but it will take strength and courage on your part. I recommend, The One Minute Manager, by Ken Blanchard.  Notice the manager in each scenario remains non-judgemental and emotionally detached from the employee’s antics and/or slacker performance.  Notice that empathy and positive reinforcement is used liberally.

Second:  While your subordinates might reject the idea in the beginning, ask each one what he/she could do to mentor this woman.  Each person could have a part in helping her to learn one aspect of the job. Remind your subordinates that their effort as a mentor to this woman will be reflected in their performance review.  However, if they decline being a mentor, it will only reflect indirectly on their performance review.  By that I mean they get points for being a mentor and for the success they created and no points for declining. In the end my hunch is the majority of your subordinates will accept. This can be a team effort that everyone learns from and benefits.

As the team leader you need to foster that process.  And remember she won’t be in the company forever, but then again, you and your team might not want to lose her after she has become a star as a result of your mentorship.

If I can be of further help, write again.

I wish you well in all your endeavors.

Amy