Graduation Got You Down?

All the finals have been taken, the yearbooks have been signed, prom has come and gone, and now the majestic sound of “Pomp and Circumstance” is resounding in your head as you remember that historic walk across the stage for the diploma. Graduation is over.

The cards and presents have all been opened and the last of the confetti has been vacuumed away. Now what?

We plan so long and hard for graduation that once it comes and goes, sometimes we get a little depressed once it’s finally over and I’m not even talking about the kids. The new graduates often have tons of ideas about what they’re going to do after marching for their diploma… party… whatever they want… move out… go to college, and they’re generally not too worried about getting started on anything right away.

They’re tired after the long, hard, work of high school, and they’re in the mood for some R-n-R, but what about the parents? Haven’t they also worked hard? Weren’t there many late nights, running around town to get supplies for last-minute projects? Didn’t the parents put in lots of hours toting kids to football, cheerleading, or clarinet practice? Wasn’t it the parents who gave up their Saturdays to sell cookies, make posters, or hold a car wash to raise money for extracurricular activities?

Yes, the parents worked very hard, too, and what do they get for their efforts? They don’t get a diploma, a party, or even a card! So, once graduation is finally over, some parents feel sort of displaced, unneeded, or even worthless.

It is possible that so much of their identity was tied up in helping the child graduate that once that happens, the parents aren’t really sure who they are anymore without the student to push, prod, support, and encourage.

Parents need to be aware of this possible risk for depression and should seek professional help if post-graduation blues last for more than a couple of weeks. If parents find themselves unable to be happy or unmotivated to start any new projects or pursue interests of their own, they may want to consult a professional counselor who can help them recover from their loss and move on.

It may seem weird to call your kid’s graduation a ‘loss,’ but for many parents, it is. It is a loss of identity, purpose, or focus, and if they don’t have anything else to point their energy towards, some parents do get very depressed after graduation.

So, don’t let this happy event get you down. Seek professional assistance if you find yourself muddling along for more than just a couple of weeks. There are so many more important projects out there that would really benefit from your involvement. Don’t keep them waiting!

Marlo J. Archer, Ph.D
Licensed Psychologist
1250 E. Baseline Rd.
Suite 102
Tempe, AZ 85283
480-705-5007
DrMarlo.com